How to Cope with the Passing of Your Loved One During COVID 19
COVID 19 can delay the grieving process of your loved one that passed on. Below some tips on how to cope with it.
- Be soft with yourself. Do not criticize or condemn yourself. You are going through a difficult phase in your life now. Be compassionate with yourself.
- Handle just the next half hour. A day at a time may be too long.
- Give yourself recognition that you have seen the half-hour through and encourage yourself to handle the next half hour. In that way, you can get through a day.
- There are often two processes that you need to work through after losing your loved one during COVID 19. The first one is the trauma and the second the lost. It is two different processes. Give yourself enough time to work through them.
- It is normal to have poor sleeping patterns while working through the trauma or loss. You can meditate to improve your sleeping pattern. If you do not have enough energy, you may go and seek medical help and request medication for sleep. Also, discuss dependency on medication with your Doctor. Anti-depressants are not addictive.
- Drink enough water.
- Follow your usual eating pattern and eat healthily. Force yourself to eat even though you are not hungry. Eat enough fruit and vegetables. Kiwi, apple, lettuce, cucumber, green beans, peas, broccoli, etc. are all healthy ways to fight depression.
- Get an anchor. Someone you can cling to, a higher authority. People can let you down or fail you because they do not understand/ engage with your intense emotions, thoughts, and actions.
- It is understandable if you used to pray, but you cannot now. You may even be angry at God. All this is normal, and you do not need to feel guilty about it. Be kind to yourself and stop criticizing or blaming yourself.
- In the short term, it is understandable if you want to blame, live as if nothing happened, suppress your feelings, or to run away from yourself. However, in the long run, it will catch up on you. Instead, try to face your circumstances little by little to work through it.
- Speak with one or two confidants about your situation. You can not speak to someone that is judgemental or wants to narrate their story while supposedly listening to you. It will traumatize you further. You are looking for someone that will patiently listen to you without any negative commentary or judgment. If you do not have such a person to speak to, consider in going to a therapist. No one can change your circumstances; however, the therapist can give you different perspectives on your trauma and will help you to look different from what you experience.
- When you find it challenging to go and speak with a therapist, you can have a daily plan to do something good for you. You might want to walk on the beach, listen to music, built a puzzle, paint, write your life story, work in the garden, or paint your home. Any creative action is precious when life sucks.
- Try to write about how you feel and what you think. Get a balance between feeling and thinking. Please show respect for your emotions and your thoughts and acknowledge them.
Look for something in your life every day so that you can be thankful. Gratitude creates a spirit of benevolence and helps one to add value to other people's lives. It is an excellent anti-depressant