May 28, 2021 in Life Coaching
The Universe Is More Invested In Your Personal Growth Than Your Happiness
“You don’t need to change the world; you need to change yourself.” — Don Miguel Ruiz
How do I fix a marriage after cheating??
My husband of 5 years has cheated on me. I'm heartbroken. Can I fix our marriage?? Is there hope for us?? Will things get better? Please help
We both have insecurities and trust issues due to past relationships... So, there's the back and forth accusations, yelling, name calling, etc. We are both extremely jealous and have no communication skills. We love each other but sometimes Love isn't enough to make someone understand that you aren't going to hurt them. How can we help each other overcome these issues?
Am I over reacting? Am I the one in the wrong no him
Ok I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he denied cheating on me but everything points to the opposite he's gone to spend the night with his baby moma and her kids in a hotel he rated me put to her when I called the cops on her for her vandalizing my car he would defend her when I would bring thing up about her and he has a video of her playing with her self am I wrong for being mad?
Idk what to do
My boyfriend and I have been fighting because he found some old messages that I had when we started going out, the messages are not bad the conversations where just like hi and bye kind of thing but because I told him I wasn't talking to anyone he's mad but da whole time he was still hanging out with his baby momma behind my back and he would delete all his messages to her so I wouldn't see them
Lost and confused at a crossroads
My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now. We have had a very tumultuous relationship both of us have hurt each other very much on each parts. But he’s done a lot more wrong it has no accountability. But my question is how do you handle it because anytime I try to talk to him about anything he automatically yells at me, deflects, accuse me of cheating. How do you go about handling
How can I get my teen to confide in me
I've been trying to get my son to confide in me about why he is feeling so depressed. He is 15 years old and a very good teen but have no idea why he is so withdrawn and quiet. Please help me I cant bear to see him like this
What do I do?
I'm not sure what to do. Recently separated mom with 2 young girls and pregnant with my 3rd.
I took my son's Ipad away because I'm at my wit's end with him.
He is so addicted and doesn’t want to do anything else. Can anyone tell me whether I did the right thing or am I being too harsh?
It's 3 y I divorced and we have shared custody of 2 lovely kids. Any advice on how to make them understand that divorced parents is ok?
What should I do?
My son is acting out in school and giving people the middle finger and running around and hitting when he is restrained and he also has speech apraxia and may have ADHD
Happiness Is A By-Product Of The Growth Achieved
“You don’t need to change the world; you need to change yourself.” — Don Miguel Ruiz
Everyone desires to be happy because life is empty if we are unhappy. But we needn’t place happiness above our personal growth, and here’s why.
The primary function of the universe is growth and expansion. I mentioned this recently in an article titled Why You Need To Be Flexible, To Survive And Thrive, in which I wrote about developing an open mind. This article follows the same path, where I propose life is more invested in our personal growth than our happiness.
Now, just so I’m clear, I’m not suggesting happiness is something we mustn’t strive for. Every person must endeavour to find happiness in their lives, whether through their purpose, passion, or fulfilling their creative goals.
What I’m proposing is that life will place greater importance on our personal growth than our happiness. Because the universe is constantly expanding and developing, it will favour change and growth through every living thing.
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Life is invested in our growth in proportion to the expansion taking place in the universe. If you are not convinced of this, simply look to mother nature, in which the animal kingdom and the environment are constantly changing.
I agree that while happiness is a worthwhile aim, it does not serve the universe’s function of expansion as much as our personal growth. Is this an idea you’re willing to embrace on some level? I know you have questions and perhaps you might disagree with some of what I’ve said, and that’s okay.
The key is to awaken a growth mindset and consider your life through a different lens. Like you, I believed attaining happiness was my primary role. But in pursuing happiness, the less happy I was.
I couldn’t hold on to it, no matter how hard I tried. Not that I was depressed or lacking; it just seemed elusive. Moreover, when I thought I had found happiness, it would slip through my hands.
Around this time, I undertook intense research into happiness. I worked with clinical psychologists in mentoring programs, to better understand the human condition. I read hundreds of books on the topic and attended seminars by esteemed experts in the area.
There was one key element that kept surfacing throughout my research. It was the idea that when we pursue personal growth, happiness is a by-product of the growth achieved. We cannot interrupt the process, otherwise, we don’t see the benefits.
You can be unhappy, yet experience enormous personal growth because happiness comes later, once your level of awareness and consciousness has increased. Clearly, you’re invested in your personal growth if you are taking time out to read this article. Part of you identifies with the growth and expansion of your inner being.
Therefore, the universe will place your happiness secondary to your growth, to ensure its aim of the expansion is complete. It is more invested in your growth because it serves life’s function of expansion.
Again, I’m not suggesting we don’t pursue happiness because it is evident throughout our relationships, purpose, career, goals and other areas. Happiness is a notable and worthwhile pursuit.
I’m implying that growth is higher in importance because from growth emerges happiness. Furthermore, happiness is not our primary role in life because if it were, why are so many people unhappy? Are you beginning to see that investing in yourself can lead to a happier and fulfilling life?
Focus On Personal Growth Without Sacrificing Happiness
“Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness.” — Eckhart Tolle
Similarly, growth is not linear. It ebbs and flows, and sometimes we will slip backward. Sometimes we repeat the same mistakes until we learn the lessons. But nothing is in vain. It doesn’t matter how long it takes to gain the lessons or growth; there’s a lot hinging on the expansion of your consciousness.
Dr. David Hawkins, a consciousness researcher and psychiatrist, believed that elevating our consciousness, it can affect many thousands of people. He outlined a map of consciousness chart, the calibration values of each level.
He believed that one individual at level 700, counterbalances 70 million individuals below level 200. One individual at level 600 counterbalances 10 million individuals below level 200. One individual at level 500 counterbalances 750,000 individuals below level 200.
One individual at level 400 counterbalances 400,000 individuals below level 200. One individual at level 300 counterbalances 90,000 individuals below level 200. Twelve individuals at level 700 equal one avatar at 1,000.
Only 15% of the world’s population is above the critical level of 200. That 15% has the weight to counterbalance the negativity of the remaining 85% of the world’s people. Were it not for these counterbalances, humanity would self-destruct out of the sheer mass of negativity.
You can clearly see why personal growth is fundamental to your life and the survival of our species. So, what can we do to focus on our personal growth without sacrificing our happiness?
It involves focusing on our passion and purpose and living our highest aspirations. Second, we ought to invest in our personal growth regularly. This requires healing our traumas and wounds to transform the past. We ought to practice forgiveness, which must include ourselves. We must strive to find inner peace, even in situations we regard as unpleasant. Finally, we ought to express gratitude for the smallest things because they become amplified, the more we focus on them.
It is with this understanding; I invite you to write 3 to 5 things you could do to enhance your personal growth. It might involve being mindful of your thoughts and negative emotions. You might choose to forgive those you’ve held resentment or anger towards. It might mean making peace with the past or changing your beliefs about it.
Whatever you choose, as you attend to your personal growth, there will come a tipping point where it will translate into fulfilled happiness and expansive joy throughout your entire being.
Original article: https://www.tonyfahkry.com/the-universe-is-more-invested-in-your-personal-growth-than-your-happiness/