Sep 29, 2021 in Life Coaching

Why Healing the Past is Vital for a Positive Future

“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.” – Kahlil Gibran

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Face Your Emotions

“Our sorrows and wounds are healed only when we touch them with compassion.” – Buddha

It’s safe to say everyone has a past and in that past lies painful memories, disappointments and frustrations. This journey of life is not guaranteed to be a bed of roses, since everyone experiences painful times. Many people can cope with negative emotions, but many don’t cope well. Some people stuff the pain where it gets stored in their subconscious mind and they don’t realise it. This negative energy buried deep down may stay there for a while but eventually resurfaces to be dealt with. It is there beneath and will manifest in certain ways and at certain times until it is dealt with. How about you? Do you have any emotional wounds from your past? Have you worked through them?

Healing the past and the pain associated with it is vital to a positive future. The first thing to recognise is that you’ve buried the pain throughout the years. Maybe your childhood was full of dysfunction or you got bullied at school. Perhaps you had a verbally abusive partner who attacked your self-worth. Or perhaps you never accomplished what you set out to do because of fear and doubt. Take time to think about your past. Take a day or take a week or as much time as you need. Are there experiences that happened a long ago that you still feel pain or anger as a result? Do you feel you were victimised, criticised, abused, or neglected? Invite the negative feelings to the surface so you can take an honest look at them. It’s important to face your emotions to heal your wounds and free yourself for a happy future.

Victims Never Heal

“Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding.” – Kahlil Gibran

Victims never heal. If you’ve adopted a victim attitude, you are disempowering yourself from living authentically. It is time to face and embrace past hurts; forgive any wrongdoers by processing them, and bidding them adieu. What happened ten years ago or even ten minutes ago is done. You have a choice to bury negative emotions or embrace them and let them go. I understand the process takes time. For example, I know of a woman who stuffed her pain for over twenty years until her life become unmanageable and she had a mental breakdown. She couldn’t bury her pain anymore and an avalanche of negative emotions and pain flooded her. She didn’t know what hit her and couldn’t figure out why she was emotional because she’d always been strong and in control. 

What happened was like a balloon that gets filled up with too much air and eventually pops. Her spirit absorbed all the pain and negative emotions and “popped.” Her life was miserable, and she didn’t know what to do. Fortunately, she came across a good therapist and support group. She worked through the pain and allowed past wounds to heal by taking responsibility for her emotional life and reclaimed her power. She courageously faced her painful past, did a lot of journaling, and started a new journey toward wholeness. She now looks forward to her future while enjoying her present and now calls her emotional breakdown a “spiritual transformation.” Have you faced the wounds of your past? Do you feel a gnawing deep in your soul that wants your attention but you keep it at bay? Do you stuff your painful feelings? Do you feel like a victim? Unable to love yourself? Unworthy? Or angry? If so, consider taking a season to heal your past. Do some reading on the subject or if you need professional help, consult a trained therapist. Allow someone who has been there to help you. As you’re proactive, you will not only experience the healing of wounds that keep you from growing, but you will be well on your way to a happy and positive future.

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