Sep 23, 2021 in Life Coaching
When You Love Yourself First, Life Will Take Care of the Rest
“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.”
How do I fix a marriage after cheating??
My husband of 5 years has cheated on me. I'm heartbroken. Can I fix our marriage?? Is there hope for us?? Will things get better? Please help
Am I over reacting? Am I the one in the wrong no him
Ok I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he denied cheating on me but everything points to the opposite he's gone to spend the night with his baby moma and her kids in a hotel he rated me put to her when I called the cops on her for her vandalizing my car he would defend her when I would bring thing up about her and he has a video of her playing with her self am I wrong for being mad?
We both have insecurities and trust issues due to past relationships... So, there's the back and forth accusations, yelling, name calling, etc. We are both extremely jealous and have no communication skills. We love each other but sometimes Love isn't enough to make someone understand that you aren't going to hurt them. How can we help each other overcome these issues?
Idk what to do
My boyfriend and I have been fighting because he found some old messages that I had when we started going out, the messages are not bad the conversations where just like hi and bye kind of thing but because I told him I wasn't talking to anyone he's mad but da whole time he was still hanging out with his baby momma behind my back and he would delete all his messages to her so I wouldn't see them
Lost and confused at a crossroads
My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now. We have had a very tumultuous relationship both of us have hurt each other very much on each parts. But he’s done a lot more wrong it has no accountability. But my question is how do you handle it because anytime I try to talk to him about anything he automatically yells at me, deflects, accuse me of cheating. How do you go about handling
How can I get my teen to confide in me
I've been trying to get my son to confide in me about why he is feeling so depressed. He is 15 years old and a very good teen but have no idea why he is so withdrawn and quiet. Please help me I cant bear to see him like this
What do I do?
I'm not sure what to do. Recently separated mom with 2 young girls and pregnant with my 3rd.
I took my son's Ipad away because I'm at my wit's end with him.
He is so addicted and doesn’t want to do anything else. Can anyone tell me whether I did the right thing or am I being too harsh?
It's 3 y I divorced and we have shared custody of 2 lovely kids. Any advice on how to make them understand that divorced parents is ok?
What should I do?
My son is acting out in school and giving people the middle finger and running around and hitting when he is restrained and he also has speech apraxia and may have ADHD
“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others.” — Brené Brown
I want you to do something before reading this entire article.
It may confront you but will be a major step towards self-acceptance.
Stand in front of a mirror and recite at least six times: “Your name, I love you.”
Gaze into your eyes as you say it, being meaningful while you deliver the words.
Avoid looking away or staring at what is behind you through the mirror. Don’t use the camera on your smartphone to do this exercise, let it be raw and simple.
Ok, try the exercise now.
What did you notice?
What kind of feelings arose?
Could you hold your gaze and feel the words I love you?
Some people are reduced to tears when conducting this simple, yet powerful exercise.
Let’s be honest, if you cannot love yourself how can you embrace the love of another person?
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You are likely to feel unworthy, however, you will still long for the love of another.
That’s where conflict arises.
When you love yourself, life takes care of the details because everything else is minor compared to the acceptance of one’s self.
“Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Be true to yourself. How you treat yourself sets the standard for how others will treat you.”― Steve Maraboli
Granted, there are times when you don’t feel loveable. This is normal and we all experience those moments. But self-acceptance is the foundation to living a complete life when you begin to show up with your whole self
In my recent book Awaken Your Authentic Self, I outline how owing our authentic nature is the most powerful commitment we make to ourselves. The narrative is that it starts and ends with you.
Clinical neuropsychologist Mario Martinez writes in The MindBody Code: “I propose that abundance is not sustainable without a strong sense of self-worth. Why not? Because maintaining health, reaching wealth, and finding love require the capacity to accept that you are worthy of your good fortune.”
The author touches on something important and that is worthiness. Your story of unworthiness is a tale assumed by others and reinforced over time, although this is not who you are.
It is a repeated affirmation and conceived narrative. You are no more that person than I am Superman. Sure, I might daydream to have superhuman powers, but when I return to reality I discover I am a man with insecurities and challenges just like the rest of us.
Nonetheless, I don’t feed those doubts because I know what I give life to, whether the power of the positive or negative gain. I don’t allow my challenges to overcome me but use them to reinforce my authentic power.
Stanford psychologist Shirzad Chamine explains in his book Positive Intelligence that we adopt ten saboteurs or internal enemies. One voice is The Judge, whose opinion is often mistaken for tough-love.
It continually finds faults with itself through a self-justifying lie: “The Judge’s most damaging lie is that we are not worthy of love or respect by just being who we are.”
In a similar vein, it was the Sufi poet Rumi who wrote: “Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
This brings us back full circle to the story title.
When you strip away the stories about who you think you are, you will uncover your authentic self, which at its essence is pure love.
So, make it a practice to meet with yourself in the mirror on a daily basis and come to love and accept the person reflected back to you.
After all, when you love yourself first life will undoubtedly take care of the rest.
Original article: https://www.tonyfahkry.com/love-first-life-will-take-care-rest/