Jan 4, 2020 in Business Coaching
Can they figure you out in 5 minutes?
What first impressions will clients or business partners have about you in the first five minutes of meeting you?
How do I fix a marriage after cheating??
My husband of 5 years has cheated on me. I'm heartbroken. Can I fix our marriage?? Is there hope for us?? Will things get better? Please help
We both have insecurities and trust issues due to past relationships... So, there's the back and forth accusations, yelling, name calling, etc. We are both extremely jealous and have no communication skills. We love each other but sometimes Love isn't enough to make someone understand that you aren't going to hurt them. How can we help each other overcome these issues?
Am I over reacting? Am I the one in the wrong no him
Ok I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he denied cheating on me but everything points to the opposite he's gone to spend the night with his baby moma and her kids in a hotel he rated me put to her when I called the cops on her for her vandalizing my car he would defend her when I would bring thing up about her and he has a video of her playing with her self am I wrong for being mad?
Idk what to do
My boyfriend and I have been fighting because he found some old messages that I had when we started going out, the messages are not bad the conversations where just like hi and bye kind of thing but because I told him I wasn't talking to anyone he's mad but da whole time he was still hanging out with his baby momma behind my back and he would delete all his messages to her so I wouldn't see them
Lost and confused at a crossroads
My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now. We have had a very tumultuous relationship both of us have hurt each other very much on each parts. But he’s done a lot more wrong it has no accountability. But my question is how do you handle it because anytime I try to talk to him about anything he automatically yells at me, deflects, accuse me of cheating. How do you go about handling
How can I get my teen to confide in me
I've been trying to get my son to confide in me about why he is feeling so depressed. He is 15 years old and a very good teen but have no idea why he is so withdrawn and quiet. Please help me I cant bear to see him like this
What do I do?
I'm not sure what to do. Recently separated mom with 2 young girls and pregnant with my 3rd.
I took my son's Ipad away because I'm at my wit's end with him.
He is so addicted and doesn’t want to do anything else. Can anyone tell me whether I did the right thing or am I being too harsh?
It's 3 y I divorced and we have shared custody of 2 lovely kids. Any advice on how to make them understand that divorced parents is ok?
What should I do?
My son is acting out in school and giving people the middle finger and running around and hitting when he is restrained and he also has speech apraxia and may have ADHD
You walk through the door 3 minutes before the meeting starts. You take a seat near the head of the table and arrange your things. Someone offers coffee, but you ask for water — sparkling if possible. You swiftly look at your phone, turn it off and lean back in anticipation.
In five minutes, your new colleagues, clients or business partners have acquired first impressions that will influence your relationship for years. Do you know what those impressions are? They often don’t. And yet they will decide how much they trust you and which facts, tasks and responsibilities they will share with you.
In addition to speech and writing, people communicate in subtle ways that are often hard to explain. Whether your first impression of someone is trust, curiosity, unease or suspicion has been labelled ‘chemistry’, ‘instinct’ or ‘subconscious’, but psychologists studying business interactions support such hunches with evidence.
Making conscious, Sherlock Holmes-style observations takes time and diverts energy from cognitive functions like running the meeting agenda through your head. Meanwhile, an instinctive part of your brain takes over and sizes people up for status, predictability, friendliness or perhaps almost invisible signals of threat, explain two neuroleadership experts at the Munich Leadership Group in their book The Leading Brain.
Such first impressions are practically impossible to eradicate from our memory, like the smell in our childhood doctor’s office. Yet, we are unaware of how we trigger them with our behaviour. Let’s walk through those first five minutes again, this time looking out for clues.
Arriving 3 minutes early made punctual people trust you. Some didn’t notice the difference, including those who arrived late.
Confidently walking to the head of the table impressed assertive people in the room, while others might have seen it as arrogance.
You started arranging your stuff instead of speaking to others, which introverted people appreciated. If you lined up your belongings in perfect right angles, some judged you as narrow-minded or inflexible.
As marketing experts can testify, your choice of sparkled water speaks volumes about you, and people interpreted it depending on their own habits.
Most of us do (or don’t do) these things with little attention. That is well done, says Nobel laureate D. Kahnemann in Thinking Fast and Slow, because trying to change such micro-behaviours is stressful and futile. But if the impact on our business is so great, is there any way to turn awareness into something more? Whether or not you have access to modern psychometric tools, the way people meet, great, speak, use emails and walk corridors can become your natural big data resource.
Observe yourself. Perhaps you’ve never reflected on how you enter a meeting room. Perhaps you make effort to act like your boss when you appear. (That’s why I used to carry a leather-bound notebook I never used.) In either case, imagine observing yourself from a mental balcony and guess how others judge your personality, talent, habits and style.
Show who you are. Observing yourself will give you great clues about the value you bring into that meeting room. Arranging your stationery in perfect order is a good sign if you are the financial auditor of the project. Making a mess of the table will be forgiven from the head of disruptive innovation.
Fine-tune when necessary. However, when you find a gap between your true talent and first impressions you could be misjudged. In such cases mild adjustments in your habits could help you over the first five minutes. An executive I coach breaks the ice with playful iPhone covers that balance his otherwise perfectly engineered appearance — a good conversation starter.
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