Nov 7, 2023 in Career Coaching
7 lies that will keep you stuck in your career.
This blog is about the lies we tell ourselves, when we are about to make a career change, to be safe in our comfort zone.
It's your turn now! Let's support each other by clicking "Helpful".
How do I fix a marriage after cheating??
My husband of 5 years has cheated on me. I'm heartbroken. Can I fix our marriage?? Is there hope for us?? Will things get better? Please help
Am I over reacting? Am I the one in the wrong no him
Ok I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he denied cheating on me but everything points to the opposite he's gone to spend the night with his baby moma and her kids in a hotel he rated me put to her when I called the cops on her for her vandalizing my car he would defend her when I would bring thing up about her and he has a video of her playing with her self am I wrong for being mad?
We both have insecurities and trust issues due to past relationships... So, there's the back and forth accusations, yelling, name calling, etc. We are both extremely jealous and have no communication skills. We love each other but sometimes Love isn't enough to make someone understand that you aren't going to hurt them. How can we help each other overcome these issues?
Idk what to do
My boyfriend and I have been fighting because he found some old messages that I had when we started going out, the messages are not bad the conversations where just like hi and bye kind of thing but because I told him I wasn't talking to anyone he's mad but da whole time he was still hanging out with his baby momma behind my back and he would delete all his messages to her so I wouldn't see them
Lost and confused at a crossroads
My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now. We have had a very tumultuous relationship both of us have hurt each other very much on each parts. But he’s done a lot more wrong it has no accountability. But my question is how do you handle it because anytime I try to talk to him about anything he automatically yells at me, deflects, accuse me of cheating. How do you go about handling
How can I get my teen to confide in me
I've been trying to get my son to confide in me about why he is feeling so depressed. He is 15 years old and a very good teen but have no idea why he is so withdrawn and quiet. Please help me I cant bear to see him like this
What do I do?
I'm not sure what to do. Recently separated mom with 2 young girls and pregnant with my 3rd.
I took my son's Ipad away because I'm at my wit's end with him.
He is so addicted and doesn’t want to do anything else. Can anyone tell me whether I did the right thing or am I being too harsh?
It's 3 y I divorced and we have shared custody of 2 lovely kids. Any advice on how to make them understand that divorced parents is ok?
What should I do?
My son is acting out in school and giving people the middle finger and running around and hitting when he is restrained and he also has speech apraxia and may have ADHD
Do you feel tired of doing the same thing? Are you tired of the same situation?
Do you feel stuck?
But every time you think about changing your career, you find it really difficult, you tell yourself that you don't have energy, you don't stop to put excuses to keep in your comfort zone (if you are interested in how to comfort zone works, click here)
Those are the seven lies that will keep you stuck in your career:
LIE #1: IT'S DIFFICULT TO FIND ANOTHER JOB - It's not difficult, but requires work. If you have not done enough work knowing yourself and working on it. It will be challenging to find the right job for you.
LIE #2: I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO CHANGE MY CAREER - When we think about changing our career, we automatically think about leaving our current job. And this will be the last step. Depending on the work you need to do minimum will be 6 months from a year to change your career. And at that time meanwhile, you can make a financial plan when you do the work needed for the career change.
Add to myWE:
THE LIE #3: I AM RISKING TOO MUCH - If you are doing it without a plan and strategy, and without not knowing yourself, and believing in yourself. Yes, you are! But if you are doing it right, you are not risking anything.
LIE #4: I DON'T HAVE TIME NOW TO PREPARE AND SEND CV'S - This is the thing I heard more with my clients and with people I know who want to change their career, but they are scared to be rejected. That's the truth. Things that they tell themselves like:
"When I'm done with work, I am exhausted to do that", "with everything I have on my plate, I don't have time for it", "I don't know how to make a CV properly".
LIE #5: YOU NEED TO HAVE THE PERFECT SKILLS, EXPERIENCE AND CERTIFICATIONS- This is another winner! Did you realize when we are about to do something that will be getting out of our comfort zone, we just want to do courses? And it's never enough knowledge, just to keep us not to take action?
LIE #6: I DON'T WANT TO START OVER - You are never starting from scratch. You are starting from experience. If you think that, click here to know what I said about it in another blog.
LIE #7: IF I KEEP GIVING IT ALL AND HAVING PATIENCE, THINGS WILL CHANGE IN MY CURRENT ROLE- Lie! And the worst is that you know it! But you keep telling yourself not to take the risk, not take action, and be safe. Safe of what?
Here I will share one of my personal experiences; when I start my certification as a coach, I sign up in bark to coach people the same day. Some people will think, who do you think you are? Well, I know enough myself to see the perfectionist I am and that in my eyes, I am never ready for anything. So I take off the bandage for good!
What was the worst that it could happen?
- No-one hiring me? Well, not putting myself out there will lead to the same result.
- Do wrong to a client? I've been coaching my coworkers, team members, family, and friends all my life. Honestly, the chances were low.
What really happened?
- No one noticed.
- I built my courage while taking my certification and applying everything with my clients.
The most important one:
- Applying and acknowledging is essential; studying is useless without taking action. Of my coaching certification program, we were 20 people, of whom only 3 are actively coaching people. Why? Because we took action! We didn't wait to be ready.
Let me tell you something, all those things you are telling yourself are your limiting beliefs to keep yourself in your comfort zone.
And the worst part of it is any of this is accurate, and deep down, you know it!
I love the quote that I will leave you below. Being honest with ourselves is not easy; it can be devastating sometimes.
" Self-honesty is the greatest honesty because it leads to all significant change". ~ Billy Cox ~
I know it very well; imagine when after 10 years of dedicating everything to my job, I discovered that I wasn't aligned with my values anymore. The person going to work, it was not me anymore. It was devastating; panicking. It was a mother-effing rollercoaster.
Of course, I never thought, tomorrow I am leaving my job. But the only left was being honest to myself and dealing with it. I started to plan, check everything I needed, set a goal, and all the milestones to accomplish that goal.
I will leave you here as well; four questions to challenge your lies:
- Am I focusing on my weaknesses instead of my strength?
- Am I taking responsibility for what I can change?
- Are those thoughts coming from fear?
- Which are the facts?
The reality is if you are reading this today. If you follow me on Instagram, you look at that topic online, and you found this. Then this is the sign that you really want to change. If not, why you are looking at it?
If you are committed to making this career change and doing the inner work. Instead of freaking out and convincing yourself to stay safe but not growing, and it looks like you are not getting anywhere by yourself. You realize you feel stuck and need someone to help you get through it.
Life is happening right now, and time is the only thing we will never get back, to lose it in a job where we spent most of our time that we hate.