Parenting Tips Every New Mom Needs
Interview with Maryam Hameed.
In this interview, Maryam Hameed gives advice for first time parents, especially for new mothers. She is dedicated to helping parents, especially mothers through their parenting journey and has also published many helpful articles on WikiExpert that guide them through the struggles and milestones of their child's life. Let's ask Maryam some questions that can help new mothers to overcome their obstacles:
Let's start by talking about Maryam's career and advice for first time mommies:
Maryam Hameed: I am a Life Coach. Question is, what made me choose coaching as my core career?
The answer is simple, but again not too simple and easy- as, it's the concept of being the only positive role model for my kid. I am a single parent and in order to keep a healthy environment for my kid financially, morally and emotionally I had to choose a field that could easily give me time to spend quality time with my kid. Along with that a way that could also teach him not to be dependent on others plus, the value of hard work (when talking of finances.)
I took my career from being a Blogger to a Life Coach. Where being a parent was the very first and original, yet relatable story I had. I knew I could help all those overwhelming parents, especially new ones. I learned from my own experience with my kid and wrote all the tips, gave them in personal sessions when needed. Later I saw, self Motivation is most needed when parenting- there are many moments of crashes you face. And I did this not only for Parents but also for High School Students ( kids). And later this led me to own my own business- making me a Mom-prenuer. So far, this is all I can say about my career, as evolution keeps man moving forward and not stuck.
For new mommies out there, here's the little advice for you:
WikiExpert: Having a newborn or even a toddler leaves mothers with little to no time. How would you advise them to find the time to take care of themselves?
Maryam Hameed: It's true that you are so much packed up with changing diapers, feeding milk and changing their clothes, etc. I remember my time when my kid was born or was in those stages, sometimes I forgot to eat my food. With time I realized that if I am healthy, only then I can do all chores well. So if my child woke up and it was my lunchtime, I took him in my lap- fed him and simultaneously ate my food.
The best time to take care of yourself is when your child sleeps. Don't get overworked by washing clothes and all. Take out some me-time. And once your kid is growing up, he/she already realizes that mommy needs time also. So, a new discovery for me and that you can use too is, while I work or take out my time. I keep my kid with me and just talk it out and let mommy do this and he understands.
The kid will only get irritated if you don't listen to them. So, I pay attention to what he wants and where he needs to be stopped.
WikiExpert: The toddler stage is an extremely difficult time, how do you advise moms to get through this?
Maryam Hameed: Shouting won't work. Give your time and by that, I mean, enjoy their little activities with them. Be playful rather than giving them the devices and toys.
WikiExpert: What are the top 3 skills every parent, including fathers, should have and why?
Maryam Hameed: Firstly, both parents should have a strong bond of love, care and affection between them. If they know these skills, your child will be skilled with them.
Secondly, both should be full of life. They should know the skill of work-life balance. So, they can raise a child full of confidence.
Lastly, the most important skill is to be teachy in a way that your child knows you understand. Befriending your child.
WikiExpert: Often at times, new mothers are compared to others. How would you advise those going through this?
Maryam Hameed: Don't pay attention to that. That's all I can say. You are you, not the one you are compared to. Be yourself, as again- this is what your child is going to learn; either being himself/herself or comparing.
WikiExpert: Please advise how moms can deal with sleepless nights?
Maryam Hameed: A new mommy will have several sleepless nights, but one can reduce sleeplessness. Try noticing the time your child sleeps daily. Sleep with him/her. And there's always a pattern of waking up and sleeping when it comes to children. Especially babies from 0-3 months, almost change routine every 20 days. So, the idea is to focus on getting sleep rather than just waiting for the night to have some sleep.
WikiExpert: How would you advise mothers to establish a routine when they have either a newborn or a toddler?
Maryam Hameed: Again it's simple, try keeping your routine according to your newborns. But yes, when it comes to toddlers, try making a routine that suits you and them. Because remember you are the parent. Play your role.
WikiExpert: You published an article on WikiExpert, the e-mommy. Which was an interesting and helpful article! Please enlighten us on why mothers should not resort to technology to console their young children?
Maryam Hameed: There's a study that proves that technology emits rays that can reduce the senses and emotions of kids. I would like to say, don't give your child any device especially when they crave it (to avoid addiction) or when they are crying (it stops the hormonal activity as the child stops crying all of a sudden.) You are the mommy so try soothing them yourself and change their minds more on activities.
I have seen many parents that complain that their toddler has issues with spoken skill milestones. That is again due to those rays and less interaction with humans.
WikiExpert: As a parent yourself, what was the biggest challenge you have encountered and how did you overcome it?
Maryam Hameed: Well, my kid is 4 now, and every milestone seems to be another challenge being a mom. The biggest challenge is so far -this age. As your child starts growing and due to that he thinks that he is older and needs to be treated like that, sometimes giving you the challenge of stubbornness and not listening. Etc etc…
When this all happens I try to see and understand if it's a tantrum or emotion. Either case, I let it pass- and ask later about the behavior and try to connect more to my kid in a friendly way. Of course, there are more challenges, but yes I must admit- upbringing is the biggest unstoppable challenge as a parent.
WikiExpert: For mothers who are working, how would you advise them on being both a good parent and managing their career at the same time?
Maryam Hameed: I am a working mother too, an Entrepreneur. I try to tell my kid that mommy has to work and all basically making up his mind so even if he wants something he will excuse and ask for it.
But during my off-hours, my only time is with my kid. So yes, leave your career to your office desk. Family time is family time.
WikiExpert: What does your typical online parenting session look like? What do you cover in them? What can mothers or even fathers expect from them?
Maryam Hameed: I do it live. I take some basic information from both parents. First individually, the next session is with both- and if anyone has complaints with each other, try to resolve it in the absence of the kid.
My sessions are training-based. I give challenges to parents, create some roleplay activities in front of me and then get their feedback on when they practically did, how was the child affected by it? And what was their biggest challenge, then. And then we work on that.
Mothers can expect to have less overwhelming.
Fathers can expect to learn to create a healthy environment for their families.
Now, let's talk about you:
WikiExpert: When you're not working, where can we find you? What do you enjoy doing in your spare time?
Maryam Hameed: Definitely watching an animation with my kid or playing an outdoor game.
I love listening to music.
WikiExpert: In your opinion, what has been your biggest success to date?
Maryam Hameed: Taking the right decision at the right time. That is, a relationship that wasn't working for me could have affected my child badly. Having it off for my kid, thinking like a Mom rather than thinking like a woman or some other role - is the key to my success to this date.
Think like a Mom, when you are a Mom. It's more about your kid, then.
Message Maryam Hameed for free to book a session today.