Jun 9, 2021 in Life Coaching

The Most Common Reasons for Infidelity

See what they are and how to save a marriage after cheating.

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In this article, we discuss how to save a marriage after cheating and also give some common reasons as to why people cheat. 

We also share articles written by registered professionals on WikiExpert, that others, just like you, found helpful.

So, like the many out there, you might be wondering why married people cheat on their partners even if they are very much in love. There are many reasons for this and a couple of risk factors that can lead to infidelity. 

Generally, when men cheat it's often because they are sexually frustrated and when their wives turn them down, they take it personally and end up having affairs.

Women, on the other hand, cheat for emotional reasons. They have the need to feel emotionally connected to someone as they are probably being ignored or neglected by their husbands. 

According to Insider, infidelity is the second most common reason for divorce. 59.6% of marriages end due to this. 

WikiExpert suggestion

See the marriage and divorce statistics in the USA, UK and Europe. Along with the common reasons, age groups and years in which it's most likely to take place. 

According to the General Social Survey (GSS), men are more likely to cheat than women. 20% of men admitted to having sex with someone else whilst being married and 13% of women had sex while being married. 

Cheating statistics by gender

However, when we take a deeper look into the statistics, it shows that women between the ages of 18-29 are more likely to cheat than men. However, this reverses in the older age groups. 

The rates for both infidelities in men and women do increase as they grow older.

Let's take a look at the most unfaithful countries according to Statista:

Most unfaithful countries

Common reasons for cheating

Most common reasons for cheating

Sexless marriages

Sexless marriages have been on the increase in the last few years. In some cases, one person has a higher sex drive than the other. This factor increases the chances of infidelity. Dissatisfaction due to sexless marriages happen for both men and women. 

WikiExpert suggestion

Are you in a sexless marriage? See the statistics, common causes and solutions to this. 

Boredom

Falling out of love is not an uncommon problem in marriages and for others, it's all about "fun". Some people seek out the excitement and the thrill of enjoying a new partner because they are bored with their current spouse. 

Revenge

Usually, when one partner cheats, the other one feels the need to get even, so then both end up having affairs. In some cases, one partner might have been hurt in another way either by infidelity and seeking revenge, the person will cheat. 

Low self-esteem

In an attempt to make themselves feel better, people with low self-esteem and self-worth might resort to cheating. 

WikiExpert suggestion

See how you can raise your self-esteem and be more approving of yourself. Written by Vitin Landivar, Online Life Coach. 

Learn how you can improve your self-esteem. Read this article by Tony Fahkry, Online Life Coach. 

Lack of commitment

Lack of commitment is the number one cause for divorce and it is also another major reason for infidelity. When there is no commitment in a relationship or marriage, this only opens the door to cheating. 

Sex addiction

This goes without saying. Those who are addicted to sex are more likely to cheat and have multiple sex partners. 

Risk factors that can lead to cheating

Risk factors that lead to cheating

Addiction

Alcohol and substance abuse increase the risk of infidelity. Even partners who are faithful can find themselves cheating once intoxicated. Even gambling addictions pose a threat. 

Domestic violence and abuse

More women are subject to domestic violence and even emotional abuse. Because of this, it makes them more likely to cheat on their husbands as they seek out the comfort they need elsewhere and tender loving care. 

WikiExpert suggestion

Maryam Hameed, Online Life Coach shares her thoughts and speaks about domestic violence in this article. 

Partners not being compatible

In some marriages, couples may find themselves incompatible with each other as they realize they can find happiness in other partners.  

WikiExpert suggestion

In this article, George Stack, Online Counselor and Life Coach discuss how two very different people can make their relationship work. 

Lack of respect and communication

When couples have difficulties with communicating effectively and when there is no respect in the marriage, it could lead to infidelity. 

WikiExpert suggestion

Learn how to communicate effectively in your relationship. Read this article by Elizabeth Smith, Online Life Coach.

Here are 5 tips on how to improve communication for couples. Read this article by Dharan Murali, Online Therapist. 

Cheating on previous partners

According to a 2017 study, people who cheat in their previous relationships are more likely to cheat in their current ones. This factor makes it difficult for people to settle down and create a healthy relationship.

Exposure to infidelity or trauma in childhood

Children who are exposed and have witnessed an unfaithful parent are more likely to cheat on their partners. Also, those who have been abused sexually, physically, or emotionally have a higher chance of cheating later on in life. 

Have you been wronged?

If your spouse has cheated on you, it is a difficult phase and it would take time to heal. So, whether you decide to stay with your partner or you want a divorce, you still need to take care of yourself. 

If you'd like to stay with your partner, then bear in mind that it will take some time to rebuild the trust you once had. It will also require a lot of work to repair your marriage from both sides. 

For those who cannot bear the pain and betrayal or if you've been cheated too many times and you want to leave, it's completely understandable. In this case, you should prepare yourself for separation, give yourself some time to heal and move forward in life. 

WikiExpert suggestion

Surviving infidelity is not easy. Here's a roadmap and some advice for repairing and getting through. Read this article by Jennifer Lehr, Online Therapist. 

Are you guilty of cheating?

If you've cheated on your spouse and you've been forgiven, this is your chance to make things right and prove yourself. You'll need to give your partner time to heal and forget. 

They will also need to start trusting you again and you'll have to earn it. 

WikiExpert suggestion

Cheated on your spouse? Here are some suggestions on how to make things right.

Conclusion

Whether you're the victim or the guilty one or you're still in a relationship or have separated, this still is a tough stage. You can read through articles on relationship and divorce on WikiExpert that were written by professionals and you can follow these topics to stay updated on the latest. 

Alternatively, you can book a session with one of our Online Relationship Coaches or Marriage Counselors. If you're going through a divorce, you can book a session with an Online Divorce Coach to help you transition.

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