Apr 9, 2021 in Life Coaching
Why do we lose the ability to love ourselves?
I spent so much time trying to find myself, then I realised I had been there all the time.
How do I fix a marriage after cheating??
My husband of 5 years has cheated on me. I'm heartbroken. Can I fix our marriage?? Is there hope for us?? Will things get better? Please help
We both have insecurities and trust issues due to past relationships... So, there's the back and forth accusations, yelling, name calling, etc. We are both extremely jealous and have no communication skills. We love each other but sometimes Love isn't enough to make someone understand that you aren't going to hurt them. How can we help each other overcome these issues?
Am I over reacting? Am I the one in the wrong no him
Ok I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he denied cheating on me but everything points to the opposite he's gone to spend the night with his baby moma and her kids in a hotel he rated me put to her when I called the cops on her for her vandalizing my car he would defend her when I would bring thing up about her and he has a video of her playing with her self am I wrong for being mad?
Idk what to do
My boyfriend and I have been fighting because he found some old messages that I had when we started going out, the messages are not bad the conversations where just like hi and bye kind of thing but because I told him I wasn't talking to anyone he's mad but da whole time he was still hanging out with his baby momma behind my back and he would delete all his messages to her so I wouldn't see them
Lost and confused at a crossroads
My boyfriend and I have been together for seven years now. We have had a very tumultuous relationship both of us have hurt each other very much on each parts. But he’s done a lot more wrong it has no accountability. But my question is how do you handle it because anytime I try to talk to him about anything he automatically yells at me, deflects, accuse me of cheating. How do you go about handling
How can I get my teen to confide in me
I've been trying to get my son to confide in me about why he is feeling so depressed. He is 15 years old and a very good teen but have no idea why he is so withdrawn and quiet. Please help me I cant bear to see him like this
What do I do?
I'm not sure what to do. Recently separated mom with 2 young girls and pregnant with my 3rd.
I took my son's Ipad away because I'm at my wit's end with him.
He is so addicted and doesn’t want to do anything else. Can anyone tell me whether I did the right thing or am I being too harsh?
It's 3 y I divorced and we have shared custody of 2 lovely kids. Any advice on how to make them understand that divorced parents is ok?
What should I do?
My son is acting out in school and giving people the middle finger and running around and hitting when he is restrained and he also has speech apraxia and may have ADHD
As children we are like sponges, we soak up the negative and the positive.
In order to grow and be stable emotionally and mentally, to be healthy, physically we need to be nurtured and encouraged, but this type of environment is not always available to all of us and the consequences can be devastating.
Whilst most of us know that no parents or caregivers are perfect, we still expect them to be, we ideally need them to be. But they just aren’t.
When we suffer neglect, abuse or abandonment in any shape or form and on any level, we perceive it to be our fault. As children we have not lived long enough to make sense of a situation and rationalize it, we are so sensitive that we can only turn to the belief that if we are not loved and nurtured in the right way, then it must be our fault.
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As soon as we take on the responsibility for the pain that has been inflicted on us, we begin to believe there must be something wrong with us and this is further impacted by observing others that are receiving the love and nurturing.
So we begin to reject our true self, disconnect from our authenticity and begin to lose our true identity as we search for clues of what the person we so want love from, needs from us. We speak differently and behave differently, we focus on what the other person needs and we further disconnect from ourselves.
As we take on the negative beliefs about ourselves, that the other person we believe has about us, we lose our ability to love ourselves and this increases over time, as we perceive every failure in life represents our worthiness.
Every time we blame ourselves, we abandon ourselves further and this makes it harder to practice self-love consistently.
So what is the solution to re-connecting to the person we really are?
I believe that awareness of the real story and what really happened is key always, to accept that you were not to blame for not being loved in the way you needed to be. And then to begin creating a new story, step by step with consistent acts of self-love, which can be challenging when your outlying feeling is that you are not worthy of it. So you have to love yourself as a discipline until you begin to feel it.
And it takes time and on those days when you struggle it will be hard and it may seem like it’s all up hill, but I want you to know this.
You don’t have to do it all at once.That life isn’t about having the job or the car or the stuff, gaining that stuff is small work compared to developing love for yourself, healing from the past, overcoming the obstacles and becoming the best person you can be.
And as someone who has walked the road and been on the journey, I would just like to say ‘’I believe in you, you can do this, take the time you need, but don’t give up.’’
‘’I love you.’’