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Jun 30, 2021 in 

Is Your Partner Committed to You?

A committed relationship occurs when a couple agrees upon a certain level of commitment to one another.

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Ann Verster

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Relationships are fulfilling, but they can also be hard. Everyone looks for something different in a significant other, and finding the right match requires work on both sides. The bubble of the first few weeks of dating someone new can be exciting, but it may lead to bigger questions about whether or not you're in a committed relationship. 

What Is a Committed Relationship?

A committed relationship occurs when a couple agrees upon a certain level of commitment to one another. The level may vary from couple to couple; for example, some may enter into a monogamous relationship while others may prefer to commit to an open relationship.

Before you can determine the seriousness of your relationship, it is imperative to be able to have conversations about tough subjects with your partner.

You should have a clear idea of what being ‘committed’ means to you and learn about your partner’s definition. Although the meaning of commitment may seem obvious, it’s important to gain clarity. For example, one person might believe in open relationships, and for them, commitment means honesty about sexual partners but not necessarily sexual exclusivity. If the other person is not on board with that definition, they might end the relationship at that point.”

“It is understandable that people don’t like to have that type of discussion. However, being a mature adult means you are comfortable discussing uncomfortable topics and can do so in a clear, direct, open manner. If you aren’t there yet, it might be time to work on that skill!”

Once you’ve gotten communication down, these more tangible signs indicate that you are indeed in a committed relationship.

They Portray You in a Positive Light

People in committed relationships tend to portray their partners in the best possible light; they minimize their flaws and emphasize their positive attributes. This can sometimes make them delusional about their partner’s negative qualities, but as long as those things aren’t harmful, it keeps people happy in their relationships. 

They Speak in "We"

Someone who feels committed speaks about themselves as “we.” For example, if you ask a committed person, “What did you do this weekend?” rather than respond with “I took the dogs on a hike,” they’ll say, “We took the dogs on a hike.”

They Meet Your Needs (and Vice-Versa)

Those who choose to be in relationships are committed because they are meeting each other’s needs. Everyone has different needs (e.g., some people desire more attention while others want a partner who's comfortable with giving them some independence), so if partners are meeting each others’ needs, they are likely very committed to the relationship. If you are trying to find a way to make your partner more committed, do a good job of meeting their needs.

They Are Highly Satisfied

The strongest predictor of commitment is satisfaction. If you feel highly satisfied, you are more likely to want to commit to a relationship.

They Don't Pay Attention To Others

People in committed relationships don’t pay attention to potential alternative partners. They may not even notice attractive people around them. If your partner's eyes are only on you, there's a good chance they feel commitment towards you.

They Make Sacrifices

Committed partners make sacrifices for each other and don’t expect favors to be returned. They have a more long-range view of things and make decisions based on what’s best for the relationship, not what’s best for themselves as individuals.

They Communicate

They want to speak to you regardless. Your emotions and feelings matter to them. They will take great care of how they respond to you when they are angry or unhappy. They will never ignore you. They are loving. They are emotionally available. They are vulnerable. They are able to put their fear aside and trust you with their soul. They are able to forgive...

Original article: https://annverster.com/f/is-your-partner-committed-to-you

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