The Psychology of Success: 80/20
Taking control of your mindset is one of the primary keys to obtaining happiness and success.
To succeed, you need to take responsibility for your life- that includes everything necessary for you: your health and fitness, your finances, the quality of your relationships, your feelings, and your emotional state.
In short: all the results you want to produce in your life.
We have little control over what happens around us and in the world at large, but we have total control over our thoughts and emotions.
Taking control of your mindset is one of the primary keys to obtaining happiness and success. Before you take action, ask yourself: “Am I in the proper state of mind that will support the action I am about to undertake?”
Usually, people want know-how- that is, strategies and formulas. What we often fail to understand is that without the right mindset or mental state, they won’t help. You cannot create change from fear and insecurity, so first, change your physiology: shoulders up, smile!
Make the change intentionally- put yourself in the right mindset. The more you do it, the higher your mental state. Then you will exude the confidence that will inspire others to follow.
The tools to do the job are essential, but without clarity of intention and the attitude to do it or die trying, you will probably fail.
The order for success is as follows:
1- A bulletproof mindset.
2- The tools, tactics, and strategies.
3- Implementation, execution, and massive action.
And these three have to be consistent.
Complexity is the enemy of execution. We need clarity, a simple step-by-step process to build the life of our dreams.
As leaders, we need to have the certainty of our ability to thrive even in stressful situations- and that comes from our mental state. Our primary responsibility is to focus on the possibilities, solutions, and answers to the problems we face.
Your mindset needs to be in line with what you want to create. You cannot lead with fear; you can only lead with courage and certainty. This is why the right mental and emotional state is an essential quality of a leader
You need to believe in yourself and that everything is possible if you believe. To remind yourself of this every day and learn to use words in your vocabulary that reflect faith and confidence. These are called power words, such as We are brilliant! See what we have created! Great job!.
People often use big words or expressions to describe a lousy state, things like What a mess! We failed! What a horrible situation! And use little words to describe victories: Good! We need to do the opposite.
Celebrate your wins daily. Learn to explain the impact and the mission of your job with words that create the meaning and the experience of a great mind. Words describe the state we are in, so we must be conscious of the terms we use.
We need to give up phrases like I can’t; I wish I were able to. These words disempower you and make you weak. The words you use to describe any situation will define your outcome. When someone asks, “How are you?”- Say: Amazing! Great! Rocking the world!
You create a positive experience when you focus on the right things. If you focus on your imperfections and shortcomings and weaknesses, you create a negative one.
If you want to develop new and better results, you must concentrate on what is right. You change your mindset, and you change your world.
There is a new and better version of yourself waiting to be discovered. There is a genius, a brilliance, a unique ability, core competency, and superpower inside of you, ready to change the world with your unlimited potential.
You need to commit to reinforce this belief in yourself and your abilities and must commit to developing a compelling vision for your life.
Resources and resourcefulness :
If you are with a mixed group of people of different backgrounds and levels of success, you will find out that everyone has failed one time or another during their lives and careers.
If you ask them why? Most will say the lack of resources was the primary cause of their failure, such as: “I did not have the money- I did not employ the right people- I didn’t have the right connections, etc.”. But history is full of wealthy and successful people who started with nothing but succeeded anyway. Why? Because they were resourceful! They had the right emotions, such as passion, creativity, determination, and faith. They refused to give up!
If you are resourceful, you can accomplish anything.
The two wolves:
Recently I come across the story of the two wolves:
An old Indian Chief from the Cherokee tribe talks to his grandson: “There is a battle between two wolves inside of us. One is evil, and it has anger, false pride, envy, jealousy, insecurity, resentment, arrogance, self-pity, and other negative traits.
The other one is good, and it has compassion, love, faith, empathy, kindness, generosity, truth, joy, peace, and hope. The child asked, ‘Which one wins?”
The Chief answered- “the one that you feed the most.”
This story is so true! We all have two voices inside of us. The negative voice is continuously telling us: stop! You cannot do that; it is impossible! The positive one says: You can do it! Do not give up! Keep trying, and you will succeed!
It happens every day. But in times of crisis and tragedies, when fear and uncertainty are all around us, it seems like the negative voice gets louder! And as fear grows, uncertainty follows.
Fear is your number one enemy
Now the truth is that we all experience anxiety. Our brain is made for survival. It is always looking for what is wrong and for ways to protect us. But as leaders, we cannot allow fear to make the decisions for us if we do that we will surely lose. When you have self-doubt, you sabotage yourself, and that is not who we are.
There is a lot of fear in the world today, and it hurts our psychology. It cripples us and stops us from taking the necessary steps we need to succeed and make progress in our lives.
Eighty percent of success is your psychology. It means h
Having faith and the right emotions and having the will to take action and never give up. The other twenty percent is having the skills and strategies.
What good is a strategy if it does not get implemented? And what stops it? Fear, laziness, procrastination- all characteristics of a poor mental state.
Fear is a habit; so is courage.
Courage is not the absence of fear, and it means that you are afraid, but you do it anyway. Fear exaggerates things. It is our responsibility to focus on the good, to gain the confidence and the courage to keep moving forward.
It is not possible to stay in a healthy and positive state all the time, especially when we are constantly bombarded with negative news.
But we need to learn to recognize when we are entering a negative state of mind and not stay there and indulge in it because nothing good will come out of it.
We need to understand that it is difficult to do the right thing, make good decisions, and have excellent relations when we are operating in a bad, fearful, and poor mental state.
The quality of our decisions determines the quality of our life.
The internal force controlling our choices is the mental state we are in at the moment we make them. When we are upset and frustrated, we make poor decisions. Also, the meaning we give to things, and the way we react to what happens to us, is dictated by the state of mind we are in when it all happens.
Some pointers on how to develop an excellent state of mind:
- Feed your mind: Look for great ideas, read good books daily to grow and improve your character and psychology. The quality of your thoughts equals the quality of your life, protect your mind. Read things that will inspire you and give you the skills and strategies to do better and win.
We are all equal as human beings, but in the market place, you cannot sell to superior people if you have an inferior growth and mindset. Read autobiographies of people who overcame significant challenges and struggles and won- then you will understand that your past does not equal your future.
- Exercise your body: Mind and body go together. You need to be in shape physically and mentally. Eat healthily and exercise. Run, lift weights, do yoga or aerobics, whatever works for you. You need not only mental but also physical energy to succeed.
- Follow a role model: Learn from people that have done it and have achieved the success that you desire. What are their habits and rituals? See what they do differently. No one is perfect, but successful people are outstanding in a particular area- that something is what you must imitate and follow.
- Watch the company you keep: Be with people that are better than yourself. It will force you to grow and become better. Surround yourself with successful people, meet the leaders and the shakers and the movers, learn how they think. Ordinary people have limiting beliefs, and great people have limitless expectations.
- Take action: You take care of your mind and body- you get a mentor, and learn from them, you surround yourself with the right people, and you do it! You take action on your goals and dreams. And you keep changing your approach until it works, and you succeed.
- You never lose by giving: If you contribute to humanity, and if you give more than what is required of you, life will become meaningful, and you will find real success.